Nairobi is the capital city of sex in Kenya, it’s a huge bedroom where people smash and pretend not to know each other when they meet in the streets. Your wife is eaten and returned to you like ‘I believe this belongs to you?’ Married men with money to burn get young girls who are hungry for flashy lifestyles, buy them stuff and the coochie is open for business. Money and fame drives this youngins so they would do absolutely anything to get it. You see lots of people work to get money and some especially in the entertainment industry for fame, but they work for these nobody will give it to them freely. These young hot-blooded girls don’t wana work for their dough, they want readymade and available cash to chop. Anybody who is loaded can smash these type of chiqs, I mean anybody! They will ignore your ugly face just to get to your wallet.

I don’t hold anything against the feminists, but truth be told most of them are hypocrites. They will rant on social media how men are trash but still be opening their legs to some nigga on the low. Most of them say that they are independent and do not need a man in their life but still be suing their exes for child support. I thought you want nothing to do with a man’s money? We need feminists in our current society, they always protect their own. But there is this group of women who bash men on social media, they post shit about men the whole day, tell us how men are dogs but still get smashed by these same men they are ‘attacking’. You want to tell me that your heart hates men but your vagina is in love? Trust me these Nairobi women who hate on men online are the ones who spread their legs the most. I know there are real feminist who stand and live by what they say. Nothing is wrong with having sex, the problem comes in when you become hypocritical about it.

I pity people who are dating, your girlfriends have now become service providers. Your boyfriend will smash all your best friends, the same friends you introduced him to. You hang out together today, they exchange numbers then later on they will exchange body fluids. Introducing your man to your female friends is like giving him a through pass. Men are like hyenas they never get satisfied with having just one woman. You might be as hot as hell but he will cheat on you with a girl half your looks. This tells you men don’t always go for looks, it’s just about the sex. You have a boyfriend but still get smashed by other men, you have a girl but still chase other women, what is the point of that relationship even? Most relationships in Nairobi are a scam, the whole thing is built on lies. Later when you find out your partner was cheating you call them hoes and yet you were also cheating. If you are not ready to commit then just stay in the smash zone instead of lying to him/her.

With this corona thing terrorizing the country, there is nowhere to party since movement at night is restricted. Ngong Hills is the latest green lodging to be launched in Nairobi. Guys car pool and your girlfriend is tagged along. Alcohol and some snacks for the road are packed. Money is hard to come by right now, you are broke so you can’t take your woman out. She won’t go to Ngong Hills with her friends just because you said NO. Not only will she go but also get smashed  at the back of the car and there is nothing you can do about it. If you are in upcountry right now and your girlfriend posts a picture in Ngong Hills, tell her ‘akubakishie’.

Sex is the one thing everybody loves but do not want to admit. That girl that you have been pursuing for so long but she still evading you, there is a guy who is tired of ‘eating’ her. Men have been crying that they sent some girl money for fare but she switched off her phone. That girl is just using you for the little money you have, there is a guy who smashes her for free, no fare no nothing. Don’t stress yourself just because you were rejected, find solace in the thought that another guy is rejecting her too. Most of these girls who pretend that they hate sex are the ones getting smashed around town.

Majority of the population in Nairobi is made up of youth, but the rest are married people; a significant number. These married Nairobi men are the ones who are in charge of the bedroom keys. They cheat like it’s nobody’s business and yes it’s none of our business but why marry then step out on your partner. You stood in front of your family and friends, made your vows to each other in holy matrimony, your wedding was presided over by a man of God and then later you hook up with young girls who are desperate for ‘THE LIFE’. For better for worse is now a scam, in fact marriage is also a scam! If you love hoeing around then don’t get married.

Everybody is smashing everybody in Nairobi. If you don’t believe me, that girl that you hit sometime, ask around if anybody else has eaten her. You will be surprised to find most of your friends on the list. I love it though that sex has become so normal in this town, let’s now turn those moans into conversations. Tell us why you love having sex, other than cumming what’s in it for you? Anybody who is walking around Nairobi claiming to be a virgin is a scam! The only virgin in Nairobi are the unborn babies. Little advice to men, your girlfriend is only yours when you are with her. She belongs to the streets so when you are not around she goes back home!

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